cleanup, add more TODOs

game/script/1.first-two-days-anon-meets-fang.rpy

@@ -251,7 +251,7 @@ label chapter_1:
     stop ambient fadeout 0.5
     pause 0.5
 
-    ###Maybe a good idea to have this song fade in, the silence from before clashes a bit. Though, I will hold off on implementing to see how the bench scene would feel with ambience.
+    #TODO: does the audio work with the new ambience?
     scene pathetic at Pan((0, 1031), (0, 0), 10.0) with dissolve
 
     play music 'audio/OST/Dragging on and on....ogg'
@@ -277,8 +277,7 @@ label chapter_1:
     with dissolve
 
     I "The hand tightens around my own and pulls roughly."
-    ###Naser moves up a bit here, is this intentional? Maybe make it a bit more subtle.
+
-    #changed to make it a bit more stubtle, but feel free to tweak as you please
     #Documentation on MoveTransition : https://git.snootgame.xyz/Cavemanon/SnootGame/wiki/Tips#MoveTransition
     show naser neutral flip at nmidright with MoveTransition(0.5, time_warp=_ease_in_time_warp)
 
@@ -485,7 +484,7 @@ label chapter_1:
 
     A "uh{cps=*0.2}...{/cps}{w=0.4} I{cps=*0.2}...{/cps}"
 
-    ###might be wise to make this more abrupt and maybe fade in some music too
+    #TODO: suitable menacing ambience or music
 
     I "There’s whispers now.{w} The hushed tones,{w=0.4} silenced snickers,{w=0.4} blending with the everpresent stares.{w} My heart hammers at my chest and I am sure that they all can hear it.{w=0.5} See the cold chill racing over me."
 
@@ -544,11 +543,11 @@ label chapter_1:
 
     I "I thought I had found a decent spot in the corner when disaster struck."
 
-
+    #TODO: confirm if 2D flipping is OK when done for comedy occasionally
-    # TODO: SFX of some kind
+    #TODO: SFX of some kind
     show naser neutral behind anon with easeinleft:
         xalign -0.6 yalign 0.1
-    stop ambient fadeout 0.25 # TODO: SFX, whoosh, whipcrack or something
+    stop ambient fadeout 0.25
     show anon fear:
         xalign 0.6 yalign 0.1
         easein 0.5 xzoom -1
@@ -558,7 +557,6 @@ label chapter_1:
     show anon fear flip:
         xzoom 1
 
-    ###Artists and Writers were hesitant about flipping with zoom last time I did it. Might want to make another version in case they don't approve
     I "Said disaster was a hand grabbing my shoulder and turning me about."
 
     I "My plate of pizza shaped cardboard threatened to smear across my shirt."
@@ -608,7 +606,7 @@ label chapter_1:
 
     A "{cps=*0.25}Suuuure{/cps}{cps=*0.1}..{/cps}"
 
-    ###Might be wise to pull out a different track. If you need more, our sound guy has plenty.
+    #TODO: music variation
     stop ambient fadeout 0.25
     play music 'audio/OST/Dragging on and on....ogg'
 
@@ -626,7 +624,7 @@ label chapter_1:
         ease 0.35 yalign 0.0
         repeat
 
-    N "SO!{w=0.5} What do you think of Volcano High!{w=0.3} How about your classes{w=0.3} You seem-"
+    N "SO!{w=0.5} What do you think of Volcano High!{w=0.3} How about your classes?{w=0.3} You seem-"
 
     I "I just nod along,{w=0.3} starting to not pay attention."
 
@@ -699,6 +697,8 @@ label chapter_1:
 
     I "What."
 
+    show naomi neutral flip with dissolve
+
     Nas "Fang’s gonna have some extra pizzas for the show.{w=0.5} You could take some home."
 
     A "I uh{cps=*0.1}...{/cps} dunno about concerts.{w=0.6} Not really one for public events like that."
@@ -715,14 +715,13 @@ label chapter_1:
 
     A "{cps=*0.5}I’ll consider it.{/cps}"
 
-    show naomi:
+    show naomi explanatory flip:
         easein 0.4 xalign 0.9
-    ###Naomi should change to her cheery expression quicker
-    
-    show naomi happy flip with dissolve
     
     N "Hey!{w=0.4} Don’t leave me out of the conversation!"
 
+    show naomi happy flip with dissolve
+
     N "How about I help you pick out some cheap food after school?"
 
     N "I know some great vegan shops in the area!"
@@ -971,7 +970,7 @@ label chapter_1:
     Sp "Oh,{w=0.4} I do need you to come by my office tomorrow for some paperwork."
 
     I "I nod and go back to the door where Naser is standing,{w=0.3} holding it open for the last of the audience to go inside."
-    ###Rock boing no longer plays in the auditorium
+
     stop music fadeout 1.0
 
     scene auditorium
@@ -1104,7 +1103,7 @@ label chapter_1:
 
     show naser considering with dissolve
 
-    ###Might wanna get a different ring tone
+    #TODO: find generic (or joke) cellphone ringtone
     play sound 'audio/OST/ringtone.ogg'
 
     I "Naser’s phone rings.{w=0.4} He moves aside to answer it."
@@ -1283,26 +1282,23 @@ label chapter_1:
     I "Pffft{cps=*0.2}...{/cps}{w=0.2} That struck a chord with her."
 
     #(In-CG insult layers)
-
     window hide
     $ i = 0
     while i < 5:
-      $ showCG()
+        $ showCG()
-      pause 1
+        pause 1
-      $ i = i + 1
+        $ i = i + 1
-    #(In-CG insult layers)
+    
-
     I "I watch as she grabs her bass and takes the arm of the purple one,{w=0.3} rushing off stage with the pink drummer."
-    ###stop le music, needs some fine tuning
+
-    # stop music fadeout 3.0
     scene black with fade
 
     window hide
     $ i = 0
     while i < 3:
-      $ showCG()
+        $ showCG()
-      pause 1
+        pause 1
-      $ i = i + 1
+        $ i = i + 1
 
     I "Oh God I can’t take this,{w=0.3} I’m gonna grow a 6 pack from laughing so much,{w=0.5} I’m just gonna grab my pizza and leave"
 
@@ -1841,15 +1837,14 @@ label chapter_1:
     # TODO: music here for Reed's intro?
     show naomi angry with Dissolve(0.25)
 
-
     N "Is that contraband,{w=0.3} Reed?"
 
-
     show naomi unimpressed with Dissolve(.25)
     show reed explanatory flip
 
     Re "Bro,{w=0.4} you’ve known I’m in a band for like,{w=0.4} a year now."
-
+    
+    pause 0.6
     show reed neutral flip
     show naomi angry:
         easein 0.25 xalign 0.1