ch5 minor tweaks

game/script/6.anon-helps-fang-find-a-venue-for-band.rpy

@@ -1121,6 +1121,7 @@ label chapter_6:
         easein_cubic 1 xalign -0.05
     show fang flip off happy with dissolve
     "She responds with a smirk and a middle finger."
+    pause .5
     
     stop ambient fadeout 4
 
@@ -1146,10 +1147,11 @@ label chapter_6:
     "We’ve been searching for a place for at least two hours now."
 
     "Fang is barely holding herself together,{w=.4} judging from her angry muttering."
+    pause .5
 
     "A lot of muttering.{w=.4} Mostly including words like murder,{w=.4} knives,{w=.4} and particular genitals as pin cushions,{w=.4} with profanity taking up a good half of what escaped her beak."
 
-    "I could see a blood vessel throbbing on her temple.{w=.4} This didn’t look good."
+    "I could see a blood vessel throbbing on her temple.{w=.5} This didn’t look good."
     pause .5
 
     "I position myself slightly behind Fang,{w=.4} putting her between me and Naomi."
@@ -1164,7 +1166,7 @@ label chapter_6:
     pause .25
 
     show naomi considering flip with Dissolve(.25)
-    pause .25
+    pause .5
 
     N "Maybe we should take a little break."
 
@@ -1237,19 +1239,15 @@ label chapter_6:
     hide naser with dissolve
     pause 1
 
-    show naomi explanatory
     N "Aww,{w=.4} his double-entendres are always so clever!"
-    show naomi neutral with Dissolve(.25)
 
     "Fang slaps a hand over her eyes."
-    pause .25
+    pause .5
 
     show fang considering flip with Dissolve(.25)
     F "I need to go too."
 
-    show naomi explanatory
     N "Why?{w=.4} Something the matter?"
-    show naomi neutral with Dissolve(.25)
 
     show fang unimpressed flip with Dissolve(.25)
     F "Monthly problems."
@@ -1261,7 +1259,7 @@ label chapter_6:
 
     N "I have regular,{w=.25} plastic,{w=.25} scented{cps=*.1}...{/cps}"
 
-    N "Oh,{w=.4} {cps=*.7}what diameter do-{/cps}{w=.4}{nw}"
+    N "Oh,{w=.4} {cps=*.5}what diameter do-{/cps}{w=.4}{nw}"
 
     show fang angry flip
     F "Shut up now."
@@ -1328,7 +1326,7 @@ label chapter_6:
 
     N "I never can get a read on how she feels."
 
-    show naomi considering
+    show naomi considering with Dissolve(.25)
     N "Like when she was feeling upset a month or so ago."
 
     N "Or just after that concert she gave after winter break."
@@ -1485,6 +1483,7 @@ label chapter_6:
     "{cps=*.3}This entire time.{/cps}"
     pause .5
 
+    # TODO: this dialogue doesn't appear to have made the final cut in previous chapters
     N "{alpha=0.75}{i}\"Oh,{w=.4} you’re spending time with Fang?\"{/i}{/alpha}"
 
     A "{alpha=0.75}{i}\"She just needed me for some feedback.\"{/i}{/alpha}"
@@ -1499,6 +1498,7 @@ label chapter_6:
     "{i}Fuck{/i},{w=.5} how didn’t I notice?"
     pause .5
 
+    # TODO: as above
     "{alpha=0.75}{i}Naomi places a finger on her chin(?) for a moment and stares into space.{w=.5} Suddenly,{w=.4} her face lights up.{/i}{/alpha}"
 
     N "{alpha=0.75}{i}\"Oh!{w=.4} What if you asked Fang for help?{w=.5} I’m sure she’d lend a hand!\"{/i}{/alpha}"
@@ -1573,7 +1573,6 @@ label chapter_6:
             jump .AnonExcusesHimself
         "Wait for Fang":
             pause .5
-            hide dimmer_darker with dissolve
             jump .AnonWaitsForFang
 
 
@@ -1768,11 +1767,10 @@ label chapter_6:
     label .AnonWaitsForFang:
     $ anonscore += 1
 
-    pause 0.5
-
     "{cps=*.1}...{/cps}No."
 
     play music "audio/OST/west_coast_kicking.ogg" fadein 1.0
+    hide dimmer_darker with dissolve
     pause 1
 
     "It doesn’t matter if my feelings are being used."
@@ -1824,6 +1822,8 @@ label chapter_6:
     pause .5
 
     show naser annoyed
+    show naomi:
+        easein 1 xalign -0.125
     show naomi shocked
     with Dissolve(.25)
     pause .25
@@ -1837,7 +1837,7 @@ label chapter_6:
     show fang happy flip with Dissolve(.25)
     F "Oh,{w=.3} of fucking course not."
 
-    F "He’s also got this pink-"
+    F "{cps=*.6}He’s also got this pink-{/cps}{w=.5}{nw}"
 
     play sound 'audio/effects/slapstickbigpunch.ogg'
     show naser shocked:
@@ -3153,7 +3153,7 @@ label chapter_6:
 
     "Moe hangs his head in despair."
 
-    Moe "‘Old dat thought,{w=.3} kids.{w=.5} I’ze gots a pissed of motha ta deal wit."
+    Moe "‘Old dat thought,{w=.3} kids.{w=.5} I’ze gots a pissed off motha ta deal wit."
     pause .5
 
     show fang behind moe